SlideShare Outage Will Be Due To Global Warming

SlideShare Under Maintenance
Wednesday, December 8th
8:00pm PST – 10:30pm PST

A mere 12 hours after discovering fire, man and his laptop mastered PowerPoint and has been posting to SlideShare ever since. And throughout its long history, SlideShare was always available to share ideas. Unfortunately, due to global warming we foresee an unexpected outage.

The climate crisis will spur a spontaneous mass migration of Emperor penguins leading them straight to our secret server farm in Antarctica. They will swarm down upon the servers for heat and shelter on Wednesday, December 8th, at 8PM PST.

We have sent warning to our unpaid interns stationed there along with fortification instructions modified from our San Francisco office’s homemade Zombie Apocalypse Handbook.

They have enough food, water and duct tape to fend off the invasion for 4 days. However, we fully expect our interns to be unable to stop themselves from taking pictures, video and impersonating Morgan Freeman voice-overs. They will let the penguins breach the perimeter because “they’re so cute!”

Obviously, these interns will have their paychecks withheld and Saturday’s trip to the downtown shops and restaurants shall be replaced with a gladiator style workout titled, “This is Sparta!” to prevent future incidents.

An unnamed SlideShare Co-Founder and CTO has accused the Linux Foundation of staging this as part of a marketing stunt. SlideShare analysts, however, will reject this theory based on the evidence, “The penguins aren’t responding to Sudo!”

We expect SlideShare to be down for 2.5 hours before being able to regain control. However, this excludes the possibility of one or more penguins creating an Arc Reactor and an Iron Man (or Iron Penguin) suit out of server parts. SlideShare Advisor Tony Stark believes the probability to be low, but there is a contingency plan nonetheless.

In conclusion, we apologize for the unforeseeable and unavoidable down time on Wednesday.

11 Responses to “SlideShare Outage Will Be Due To Global Warming”

  1. max

    It is a shame that the unpaid interns will have their pay withheld. I mean, I’d be furious if I were them…

  2. Dennis

    “unpaid interns” and “these interns will have their paychecks withheld” doesn’t match :-)

  3. Andrew

    Glad my presentations are backed up. They’re all about how Windows is better than Linux, and something tells me these penguins may not like it.

    (just kidding, they’re about software only on Windows, not Windows itself).

  4. dulcemariagutierrezgonzalez

    vamos PITAGORAS a ganar, son el mejor equipo de todos los segundos saben que las apoyamos al 100 vamos fabi, angi, lupita, ana, yari son las mejores mañana a ganar en el concurso ustedes pueden lograrlo el 2 “D” es el mejor yeah
    atte Dulce… Maria Gutierrez Gonzalez